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A life in Colombia
Browsing All Posts published on »September, 2010«
Because Colombians are cute
“My name is Luna,” she shouted, with a huge smile. “But in English it’s ‘Moon’. You can say ‘Moon’.” I giggled through the sweat pooling beneath my eyeballs. “Luna is okay,” I panted. “Luna is better.” It was my second time at my new spinning class and I was still a spectacle. All of the […]
Apparently journalism is addictive
September 27, 2010
I have always hated rollercoasters. My knuckles are white when Bogotá taxi drivers negotiate sharp corners and I generally distrust motorbikes. If asked about my many pointless fears, I gently insist there is nothing enjoyable in “unnecessary adrenaline”. But one of the few worthwhile rushes is the feeling of finding or writing a really good […]
Just warming it up for you Sir!
September 20, 2010
The bus had been stationary for an unusually long time. I switched off my iPod and looked behind me. It was empty. I looked at the driver and the bus conductor, who were both staring at me with pity splashed across their faces. “Er, I go to 68th street? This bus is not correct?” I […]
Life on the funny farm
September 17, 2010
“Don’t go near that duck,” my housemate ordered, as we walked to our corner shop. “It’s a psycho.” I watched the huge bird with some confusion as it waddled along the pavement, squawking angrily. The four of us live in a two-storey house in the middle of an urban area in central Bogota. Although I […]
Ricky Gervais eat your heart out
September 16, 2010
“What is this green splodge here?” I murmured politely. “That?” whispered the artist, leaning forward. “That was the time I came home drunk, tripped up the stairs and knocked over a tin of paint with my ass.” “Oh,” I whispered. “And what is that large red streak there?” “Ah,” said the artist, stroking his chin. […]
I am totally screwed
September 13, 2010
Ask me if I’m competitive. “I am not competitive,” I will reply indignantly. “I’m one of those easy going people.” I will probably pause and smile innocently. “I’m quite happy for other people to have their success,” I will insist, shrugging my shoulders. “I’m just happy to go with the flow.” Ah, how well we […]
The green streets of Bogotá
September 7, 2010
“I want a lodger who is sensible about lights and showering and the electricity generally,” the advertisement read. “Not because I worry about the expense, but because I worry about the environment.” I read that description when I was searching for an apartment in Bogotá (for those of you worrying, I’m now permanently renting a […]
Can beggars be choosers?
September 4, 2010
“You look at them with such pity,” Diego snapped. I hurriedly averted my eyes from the forlorn figure of a tramp, huddled beneath his blanket in a filthy shop doorway. “Oh, it’s an English thing,” I said hurriedly. “They usually have dogs and you know how English people feel about dogs.” “No, you feel sorry […]
57 varieties is the spice of life
September 3, 2010
Gah! I think I’m turning into a Latino. I was in the supermarket the other day, skulking among the tomatoes, when I spotted a tall, blonde girl at the checkout. I was momentarily surprised. Every other shopper and staff member was short and dark. She shone like a beacon. The girl had her back to […]
Get on your dancing shoes
September 2, 2010
I might dance like a blind giraffe. But I am determined to master the art of salsa. That’s the only reason I have spent the past five months agreeing to dance with every Latino who grins my way. Now I live in Bogota I have no excuse for not taking some organised classes. Last night […]
September 29, 2010
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