Wanted: Three wives please

October 5, 2014


The secret to happiness?

I’ve just returned from La Guajira, that desert wilderness we all forget to visit in the top corner of Colombia and, as usual, I had a lovely time because I also forget to visit Colombia’s forgotten corners – mostly because I am too lazy to leave the capital and I get nervous when it’s difficult […]

Posted in: Colombia, La Guajira

When did it become so cool to be Colombian?

September 7, 2014


Taste the difference?

A few years ago, I was travelling somewhere or other with an Irish girl I’d met. Everywhere we went, she was the centre of attention. People loved her accent, her dark hair, her blue eyes and they always wanted to buy her Guinness. “It’s very cool to be Irish, isn’t it?” I asked her one […]

Posted in: Bogotá, Colombia

Are you there God? It’s me, the atheist.

July 9, 2014


Suspiciously colonial?

I am lucky in that, when I was a child, my mother read me a story every night before I went to sleep until the golden day finally came when I was deemed old enough to read by myself. She took me to the library and let me choose two books. I left with Enid […]

Posted in: Bogotá, Colombia

England expects, Colombians respect?

June 23, 2014


It's a game of two...

I have a strange relationship with football in the way I have a strange relationship with many things (politics, religion, other people) There are just too many aspects of my life, personality and values that lead me to be snobbish about the game (I think there’s a lot of homophobia in football, for example, there’s […]

Posted in: Bogotá, Colombia

My name is Vicki and this is my number

May 11, 2014


Can I have your number?

My great-grandmother was a housemaid. She wore an apron, she cleaned, she scrubbed. She said: “Yes Ma’am,” a few hundred times a day. The next generation were more or less the same, on both sides. One grandfather was a bus conductor, the other operated a printing press (I like buses and writing, go figure) Then […]

Posted in: Bogotá, Colombia

Writing, editing, worrying, dreaming… done?

April 30, 2014


I get by with a little help from my friends?

Let me tell you a secret. I, Victoria Unpronounceable (that’s a nudge for the Colombians, by the way, because they make such a mess of saying my surname. In fact, I am now registered with several Bogotá taxi firms and pizza deliveries as Victoria Sanchez and will be until I actually date someone with the […]

Pa’ La Guajira?

April 23, 2014


On safari?

There was only one way it could begin. “Are you a singer?” a tiny voice asked, from behind the seat on our flight to Valledupar. “Yes,” my boyfriend smiled, turning to the little girl. “Are you?” “No,” she giggled. “My grandfather is.” The pair chatted in rapid costeño before my boyfriend turned to me. “Her […]

Posted in: Colombia, Valledupar

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